No, you may not have a bite of this taco, for he is my Darling Dog.

Bluebird!

Bluebird of Yippee by ~bumblefly on deviantART

/soapbox

I'm not sure how to introduce this, so I'll just launch right in. I encourage my friends to comment, no matter what you have to say. Yes, this is based on specific things, but it applies to so many people and situations. I was going to generalize and say, "Why do guys ____" but I'm sure there are women who do it, too.

Some people need to learn how to apologize.

I don't mean grovel, I don't mean beg forgiveness for a wrongdoing, I mean just the simple act of expressing that you didn't mean for something to happen. Whether you didn't mean to do the thing you did, or whether you just didn't mean for someone to get hurt over it, saying "Sorry about that," is essential to keeping friendships.

Let me say it again. Saying, "Sorry about that," is ESSENTIAL to keeping friendships.

Now I am going to generalize a bit, because stereotypes happen for a reason, and I fully admit that there are exceptions in both directions. Guys seem to be more reluctant to do this than girls. I think it's because they want to keep their appearance of toughness, independence, and self-respect. I've gotten the impression that guys will just never ever apologize, because they think doing so would mean bowing to the person they're apologizing to and giving them power. So it actually takes a guy with MORE confidence to apologize, because they can realize that saying they're sorry for something that happened does not cut them off at the knees or kick them in the balls or otherwise diminish them.

When you have friendships, you always have misunderstandings, missteps, unintentional hurts. If you slap a dude on the back, and he screams at the top of his lungs because he had just gotten a tattoo, and you didn't know, you should apologize. You didn't do anything wrong, because you didn't know about it, you didn't do it on purpose. Saying you're sorry at this point means, "I'm sorry that what I did hurt you." Now that you are aware of it, you won't slap his back again for a good long while.

Over the internet, things can be worse. Easier to do something hurtful completely unintentionally. You always read silly little internet articles about this, about the importance of being clear, and using smilies to express sarcasm or playfulness. (Those smilies get cheesy pretty quickly, though, I don't really advise using them to punctuate the intent of every single thing you say.)

One of the easiest things to do is unintentionally ignore someone, which can cause the feeling of being snubbed. The person not getting a response doesn't know that you're currently reading over your sister's thesis paper. Or that you had to leave the computer to clean up after your cat's daily puke. You can start taking the online presence of your friends for granted, just assuming the company of simultaneous online-ness is enough. But it's not!

What if you came home from work or the store, reading the mail as you walked in, and the person at home greeted you. Yes, you're distracted. Yes, you might ignore the greeting for a moment. But you realize that if you don't acknowledge your friend/family memebr at all, it's rude. At this point in time, the appropriate thing to do is say, "Oh, sorry, I was reading the mail/juggling groceries/something." You're not apologizing for reading the mail, you're not making yourself less of a respectable person, you're just being a sociable human being, a friend.

A friend of mine with a relatively new child is teaching her politeness early. She taught her girl to say "please" and "thank you" within the family and everybody else. Someone commented on this, and said, "Oh there's no need to be polite, we're family!" and this shocked both my friend and myself. Politeness is doubly important between friends and family. It shows respect, affection, and a general concern for the well-being of your friends. When you appreciate something, you should thank for it. When you regret some action or consequence, you should apologize for it. Unless the apology's recipient is a complete *insert terrible word here*, you will be respected and liked MORE because of your expression of care.

tl;dr: You're being an inconsiderate jerk if you don't ever apologize. Stop treating apologies like they're going to kick you in the nuts or make you less of a man or woman. If you like the person, and you hurt them, even (especially!!) unintentionally, apologize for the hurt, and things will be so much better.

I feel AMAZING

Okay, so, since this isn't LJ, there isn't the suspense of an LJ-cut to hide the photo behind, but pretend you can't see it yet.

Today, I had a very long visit to Wal*Mart. I feel like a new person, because of some things I got.

- $5 discounted Swiffer WetJet, to inspire me to clean (and I do feel inspired!)
- A nice little mouse with snap-in usb receiver for the netbook to please my geekiness
- a $15 pair of jeans that ARE COMFORTABLE and ACTUALLY LOOK GOOD. Flared leg bottoms, and some decoration on the back pockets to accentuate the fact that they actually FIT my bottom, and don't just sag and show off the fact that I have very little to show off there
- delicious food, a few unhealthy, mostly healthy! (I've learned to like broccoli in most formats, what a leap for me!
- a cute pair of $5 sunglasses, which I can actually wear, because.....

(now you can look at the photo!)



I GOT CONTACT LENSES!!!

I haven't not worn glasses since I was 9. 20 years in glasses. I do not know myself. I didn't know my eyes were that dark. Everything is a little bigger. The dog food cans are bigger by about half an inch across. The carpet is closer, and more detailed. I LOVE IT. I LOVE IT TO BITS.

The eye doctor had a hard time getting the left one in my eye, but once I was shown how to do it myself, it was a snap. Got it out on the first try, and back in on the second. I feel fantastic.

Last hurrah!

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Feeling Marvelous!

This morning I got to my bus stop 3 or 4 minutes early, so I decided to hoof it up the hill to the next stop. WHEW. Halfway through, my legs said, "PLZ NO" but I kept going.

Then a while after I got to work, I put one of these in my water bottle:

Lipton's Energize To Go Iced Tea Mix, Blueberry Pomegranate flavor! 0 calories, 100mg caffeine, and 160mg "protective flavonoid antioxidants" per packet. Very tasty, and probably contributed to my energy and good mood. Yay!

What a rotund 'fellow!'

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Happiness Project!

Happiness Project ( Mini Branch) on Facebook

Out of my way Train!

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This is what the creek normally looks like.

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The clouds are doing really pretty things this evening!

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w a t

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Two pictures so far

from Snipe Con '09. I don't have a normal camera anymore, so these were stills taken by the camcorder.

This is on the way between Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg. I <3 Tennessee.


During the OMG WTF BBQ, our delicious meats smells attracted a full grown black bear! It appeared ambling across the bottom of the driveway, and our yells and hollering made him decide to just keep ambling, up into the wooded hillside. What a rush!

The cooking also attracted this, which was not a bear.


There was also a siamese, and one guy said he saw a raccoon later that evening. Whee! Wildlife!

HE HAS EYE-FANGS

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Heh heh

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Cherry tomatoes ahoy!

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Where is my teleporter with which I can go and visit people I like but basically never see?

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First Tomato!

I think I'll only leave the big ripening tomato a few more days. Today, though I discovered three of my cherry tomatoes are turning red! Daniel decided he wanted to eat one orange, so here it is, our very first picked tomato. He said it tasted kind of green (to be expected), but quite good. So exciting!

First things first, Stacey, here is my reddening tomato. It looks redder here than it really is.


Second, there's about a gazillion grape/cherry tomatoes growing, and I can barely wait for them to ripen! Yes, I don't remember what type I planted. lulz. There's maybe six or eight more clumps like these two, filled with little round stripy tomatoes.


And lastly, I was starting to worry that I was doing something wrong with this African Violet, but here is a flower beginning to unfurl! And there's about 7 more flower buds all around the top, under the topmost leaves. I'm excited for them to bloom!

Gorgeous flower I got a picture of today! My new phone wallpaper.

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WORKIN' HARD

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What a pointy apple!

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Leaning pretty bad!

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Too cute!

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Three dozen grape tomatoes can be seen, and a dozen regular. I like the smell of tomato plants!

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Amazing Glorious Golden Spork of Yore for sale!

(View Auction)







Feel free to spread this around.

Shy critter at Cumberland Falls

PLANTS

I've never tried to grow so many plants un-casually!

I have:
cilantro
african violet
the beginnings of another pot of violets (hopefully)
tomatoes
hummingbird vines
sunflowers

the last two of which I seeded just tonight.

I've been using gmail as a To Do list that I can't minimize down, like its actual list function. I turned on special stars, and send myself an email for each item, with the item as the subject line so it's right there in visible list form, then mark each item with a purple star. I make an effort to do at least one purple-starred item every day. So far I've met or exceeded that every day since I started. It helps keep me from feeling overwhelmed, because I don't feel pressured to get them all done Right. Now. *pleased!*

Stacey, there's five tomatoes so far! :D

Tomatoes are happening!

thimks that sharpening a brand new pencil can be fun

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Red Panda by ~bumblefly on deviantART

Red Panda in prismacolor pencils

Red Panda by ~bumblefly on deviantART

Coming along nicely!

I really love my job!

Thanks to Game Stop trade-in credit, I am now a Legend of Zelda Gangster.

Yay tomato planter!

Purty!

Maggie Valley, NC is lovely!

Weekend trip!

Quiero has a luxery spot at my desk!

Hooray for spring!

Let's go on a trip!

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Road trip!

Bluebird work in progress

Tablet 002 - Bluebird WIP by ~bumblefly on deviantART

My cilantro is going all over the place!

Pastel Fishy Fish

Tablet 001 - pastel fish by ~bumblefly on deviantART


As I wrote in my Facebook link to this:

I just got a Wacom Bamboo tablet, so I'm going to try to do something with it every day and upload it for critique and suggestions and whatever you have to say about it.
The following goes for all such tablet practice submissions of mine: Artsy people, tear it apart. Non artsy people, say something you like or don't like about it. Be constructive with your comments! :)

Seaside Photo Holder

Note: my blog format cuts this off; if you click on the picture, it goes to its DeviantArt page, where you can see the whole thing, and some commentary.

Going through stuff in the Junk Room, I found this story beginning

May 2, 2002
[handwritten in a sketchbook, don't know why. I don't remember writing this, but it's my handwriting!]

Peter was your typical geeky, outcast of sixth grade, inept-in-all-situations even vaguely social, physically clumsy and nearsighted, and yet he was the one most adept at handling what was going to happen.

It began with odd sensations -- the feeling that when you talked to yourself, out loud or in your head, that someone not quite, but alost, jus like you was answering. It grew from that sensation -- unnerving for most people, unnoticed by Peter -- into actual voices. The odd thing about this was that anyone nearby coud hear your voices, too. Peter remained unaware of the fact that everyone else in the world was experiencing what he decided was just another figment of his overactive imagination, coupled with the cheese-and-mashed-potatoes toasted sandwich from earlier that evening. He frequently saw things under his bed, long after most child psychologists said was the normal cutoff age for night fears. Peter shrugged most of it off, and ignored the monsters, who really were just misty productions of his mind. Alone in his navy blue saturated bedroom, Peter tucked his finished homework into his navy blue backpack (his last name carefully printed on th ebottom), set it on the navy blue carpet beside the door (plain wood), and settled himself into his navy blue fleece-covered beanbag chair. His parents were out for the evening, on one of their weekly dinner-dates. "Keeps the romance alive," they would frequently say, to which Peter would usually wrinkle his nose and silently consider whether to have a frozen pizza doctored with plenty of barbeque sauce, or one of his oddball sandwiches that night. Barry and Michelle Spathi had decided four months ago that their son was responsible enough to be left home alone, with the instructions to turn off the tv at 7, and go to bed by 8. For the ost part, Peter followed these "sugestions," but he generally stayed awake until around 10 reading sci-fi and fantasy.

That night Peter Spathi was curled up in his beanbag, three chapters into Susan Cooper's Greenwitch, when the voice beside his right ear became intelligible. It was muttering things like, "need to cut your hair, you know, I keep telling you that," and "yup, I've lways liked that poster." Peter paused his reading and lifted his gaze to stare at his wall blankly while he listened. His eyes unfocused as he regarded his options. He decided on blowing a raspberry, and did so. Peter immediately registered a feeling of suprise that was not his own, and the voice beside his ear quieted ("rather childish for you, Peter"), and then subsided.

Two and a half chapters later, Peter began to feel a slight pressure on his right shoulder. He leaned his head to the left and twisted his chin over to look to his right. There in his field of vision sat what appeared to be a twiggy, navy blue-haired fairy. Peter blinked once and squinted, because the creature was foggy and somewhat transparent, and he could see his wizard poster through it. Peter briefly wondered if that was the poster that the voice had complimented. He then realized that the mysterious voice most likely belonged to the light weight on his shoulder. The fairy winked at Peter. "My name is Serth Tappei," it said in alost-Peter's voice. Serth was starting to solidify and get heavy, and peter could discern somewhat masculine features on the btterfly-winged little being. Peter blinked again. Serth stood up from his corss-legged seat, and lept lightly to Peter's knee. Tis gave Peter a better view of the seven inch oddity, so he took his time staring carefully at it, not even bothering to say anything.

That is not dippin dots on my porch railing, that is snow!

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